Okay, a bit of an exaggeration, but if you looked at my Twitter feed, Facebook page, and now this blog... Right. I think it's time for that restraining order, don't you?
Maija's post - written in September; I never said I was a good stalker - has inspired me to get off my butt and write you a post. It's mainly so I can flee the box-filled trauma that is my room, but nevertheless a post exists for you!
What makes me, me?
I think they're the things no one else has noticed. I have two freckles on the front of my neck. When I pointed them out to my family members as a way to identify me when I'm dead and all that's left of my charred remains is my neck, they just looked at me. "What freckles?" my aunty asked, confused. I pointed.
"... Tash, if you get burned to death, it's hardly likely that your neck will be the only thing to survive," Dad said. "We'll have to identify you by your tooth."
Which isn't as appealing an option, as I don't know what my teeth look like and I have none that I particularly want associated with me (if I died today, I'd look ridiculous and my dentist would cry).
I have always thought I can talk to my dogs. Any other animals, I don't really try, but my dogs and I have always had long conversations about stupid things. You know, conversations about how eating Christmas Beetles isn't probably the most nutritious choice, but then again, neither's chewing on a piece of carpet.
This probably makes me insane.
I love Coldplay, because they have achieved the impossible - their music calms me down when I am mad. I don't know why, but I discovered this amazing skill when I was depressed. (Clinically so, not "my mother won't buy me a Chanel backpack my life sucks I'm so depressed hashtag firstworldproblems".) I don't know what possessed me to buy the Coldplay CDs, but I had $30 cash on me, and the CD shop had them bundled up nicely. X&Y, Parachutes and A Rush of Blood To The Head for $10 each? Eh. Why not?
When I came home and had a fight with my mother that I instantly wanted to solve by my own death (I had a cheery outlook on life), I figured I should probably not waste that thirty dollars. So I put in X&Y, and somehow... I don't know. Perhaps it's distraction techniques, but it calmed me down. And since then, I've been besotted. I am probably known at the local Sanity as being the Coldplay Girl, seeing as when Mylo Xyloto was coming out, the following exchanges took place:
SCENE 1: After finding out there's a new Coldplay album
Me: Excuse me, I've just heard there's a new Coldplay album coming out. I don't have a date, or a name. But I'm pretty sure it's the 4th of October. Or at least, that's when the pre-orders will be available.
Girl: Uh... okay. Let me just check.
Me: No problem. I'll just go look at this Johnny Depp poster.
Girl: There's nothing about it yet. Are you sure they meant Coldplay?
Me: ... yes. I'm sure.
Girl: [dubiously] Well, maybe come back in a few weeks. I might be able to find it then.
SCENE 2: A week later, after Coldplay has officially announced the album
Me: Hi! You probably don't remember me. I was in here about the Coldpl -
Girl: I remember.
Me: Right. Well, Coldplay has announced it now. See? [holds out phone, where email detailing Mylo Xyloto is happily glowing]
Girl: What's it called?
Me: I know. It's a strange name. I'm a bit scared to try pronouncing it, ha ha ha ha.
Girl: [types] Oh. There it is.
Me: Success! When's it coming out?
Girl: October 24.
Me: Excellent. I shall be back then to buy it.
Girl: You don't want to preorder it?
Me: Nah. Somewhere else might get it first. Well, thanks! Have a great day!
SCENE 3: The day before Mylo Xyloto is released
Me: Hi! I'm just wondering if you've gotten Mylo Xyloto in yet.
Different Girl: No! I'm sad.
Me: [not quite able to believe there's a fellow Coldplay lover at Sanity] Me too! I was hoping you'd have gotten it a few days early, like you did Offspring.
Different Girl: Apparently there's an embargo. How lame.
Me: Extremely lame. Anyway. I'll be back tomorrow then.
Different Girl: Awesome! I'll see you then!
SCENE 4: THE MOMENTOUS DAY
Me: Hello! Coldplay is out today!
Girl: ... we haven't had it delivered.
Different Girl: Don't worry. Come back around 1. They usually deliver then.
Me: I will be back at 1.
Me: Is it in yet?
Different Girl: No! Gah! Try a couple more hours.
Me: Will do!
Me: How about now?
Different Girl: We got a phone call from the courier. They're not bringing them in today.
I eventually got the CD after much craziness, but from a different CD store.
Right. Well. What else makes me me?
I have an unusual fondness for Harry Potter. Not because I want someone to say to me, "Yer a witch, Natasha," and ferry me off to Diagon Alley. I love the symbolism, I love how much detail and how much work she's put into the books, and I love how every bit ties neatly together. It might be English nerd of me, but I may have gone through all those books and deconstructed them for the sake of deconstructing them.
At the moment, my closest friend is my cousin Daniela. It always ends up this way. I fear I am turning her into a miniature (yet taller) me, but possibly with better music taste. She is a lovely girl, very sarcastic when she wants to be. She also has a fair bit more common sense and doesn't get overexcited about stupid things, such as Chameleon Circuit releasing a new album. ("So... they sing songs about Doctor Who?" "YES." "... You are a bit of a nerd. I'm not even apologising for saying it.") She is, however, great fun. I've noticed that whenever we get together to watch movies, it always ends with us ranting. "That doesn't even make any sense. Oh my gosh, that character is so lame. I could act better than them... hey, Tash, that was such a great movie, hey!"
We recently did this for Pirates of the Caribbean 1.
Daniela: "You know who I really hate? Elizabeth. Look at her. She was smarmy even when she was a kid."
Me: "I want to know just what part of Norrington can make that age difference okay. I mean, look. Imagine that as a photo on their mantlepiece. 'Elizabeth was twelve when we met, and I was already captain in the Royal Navy.' Why does he even want to marry her? He can marry me. I'm sure the age difference is what he's used to."
Daniela: "Also, why is Governer Swann's wig brown? Why do they all go white when they move to Jamaica?"
Me: "Urgh. Will Turner. Who invented that guy?"
Daniela: "Worst character decision ever. Look at him. Www....Will Ttturner. Pah. Learn to speak."
Me: "Why does Elizabeth have freckles, but suddenly not have them when she grows up? I mean, how is it physically possible that in England she gets freckles, but suddenly in Jamaica she's all freckleless and not riddled with cancer?"
Daniela: "Maybe she just turned into a giant freckle. Do you always watch this scene with Why Is The Rum Gone in your head?"
Me: "YES. I thought I was the only one who did that."
Daniela: "How hard can it be to call her Elizabeth? I call her Elizabeth."
Me: "Bet he went home and wrote all about calling her Elizabeth in his diary."
Daniela: "Ha! 'Dear Diary, I think Elizabeth likes me. Like, like likes me. She wants me to call her Elizabeth! I don't think I should propose yet, though. I might wait for a little while. Like, in the middle of a battle on Davy Jones' ship.'"
Me: "I am so glad they cut those two out in the end. Preacherboy for the win!"
Daniela: "Hush! Johnny Depp!"
I draw, and I write.
These two make me very happy. I wish I was better at drawing. According to my mother, this is very selfish as I am very good at drawing. I disagree, but whatever. This is the only picture, besides a picture of Ron I left in the tearoom at work to scare everyone, that I have uploaded to Facebook.
I enjoy writing. Writing is a heck of a lot of fun.
Because I've realised it's nearly 10:30 and I am still lounging in my pyjamas (I'm a slob now), I'll wrap this up quickly with the thing that most makes me, me.
I'm a Christian.
I don't always live up to the standard that Jesus left me. Lately, I've been failing more than succeeding.
I know, however, that He loves me no matter what. He knew I'd trip over my own feet when He chose me.
Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand. - Romans 14:4He still pulls me up and still calls me His daughter.
He shows mercy that I don't think I could even show, if someone slapped me in the face that many times. I know I couldn't show that.
And He is the epitome of flipping awesome, because He doesn't judge me based where I've come from. He doesn't say that because I'm a nearly-20-year-old who has suffered from depression and anxiety, who has a ridiculous love for Coldplay and Harry Potter, and who either takes things too seriously or not seriously enough, that I'll not do anything for Him except sit there and look pretty. He says that I can, and I will, do things. Because I'm His.
And that is cooler than anything.
I want to do another post similar to this next time, but sort of based off what the opening to my elusive novel is. So you have that to look forward to/dread.